I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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