There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
