Duck Duck Cougar?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
40s are totally the cure
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
My butt remains clenched, sir.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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