can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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