Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
