No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
