We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
