I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
