we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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