the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
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