Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
