It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Randomize
