I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
