Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
my poor anus
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
