they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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