Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
pop tarts are not kleenex
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
