trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
