Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
