forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
