I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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