I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
