Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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