College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
