I wanna bring you to show and tell
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Randomize
