Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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