I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
