? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
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