I want to walk on stilts...naked
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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