Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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