sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
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