RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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