As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
