i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
