Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
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