Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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