i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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