Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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