who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
is that a dick in a sweater?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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