I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
