I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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