I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
