good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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