I didn't shave. On purpose
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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