hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
