plz talk dirty to me
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
