when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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