Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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