just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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