life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
