I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
